Ever Thine Ever Mine Ever Ours
by MadameRozaBelikova
Summary: It's been 5 years since New Moon. Edward & Bella meet again.. Can true love survive separation? What happens when Bella already has a man who loves her? Full summary inside...
1. Chapter 1: Izzie Swan

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. All characters and original storyline belong to Ms. Stephenie Meyer. **

**This is an alternate universe. The Cullens are still vampires and Bella is still human. I have posted Fanfiction for Vampire Academy, but this is my first Twilight fanfic. Please review. I do not have nor want a Beta. I try to proofread everything twice. Please enjoy! **

**This story is set 5 years after the Cullens left in New Moon. They never returned to Forks. The Cullen family has moved to Portland. Carlisle has made chief of staff at Portland Community Hospital. Little do they know that Bella is attending the University of Portland and is dating one of the interns that work under Carlisle. The entire Cullen family along with Tanya Denali attends a benefit given by the hospital where Jim and his girlfriend who just happens to look a lot like someone from their past participate in a dance competition to raise money for the benefit. Everyone is shocked when they see little Bella Swan has turned into a graceful woman. No one is more shocked than a very jealous Edward. What lies in store for Bella and Edward? Read on to find out! **

Chapter 1: Izzie Swan

Jim POV

"Paging Dr. Cullen to the ER Paging Dr. Cullen to the ER."

"Wow that guy really is a God around her isn't he?" I asked Karl one of the Residents at Portland Community Hospital. I had started earlier that month as an intern and learned quickly that Dr. Carlisle Cullen was the man to watch.

"Yeah he's always on top of things so you better watch out. It's like he never sleeps and he has eyes and ears in the back of his head. He knows everything that happens around this hospital and is the most skilled surgeon on the staff. That's why he made chief of staff so quickly when he's only been here a little over a year."

"In that case I better get moving. I can't afford to lose this job."

"Oh yeah you're still trying to save up for that ring huh?" Karl chided me.

"Am I that obvious?"

"Oh yeah! You've got it bad for that Isabel chick you always talk about. I can't believe you've been together two years and are still haven't popped the question. You commitment shy or something?"

I sighed before responding. "No not me, her. When I met her she was still not over a recently bad break up and although we've made tremendous progress since then I have this feeling that marriage isn't on her mind just yet."

"So she's still hung up on that other guy? Dude I couldn't put up with that. I need to know that my woman is my woman you know what I'm saying?"

I stiffened. I knew he was right, but I didn't want him to be.

"I hear you man, but I don't know what it is about this girl. I'm so drawn to her. I need to be around her constantly. I don't think I could give her up if I tried." Sadly it was true. Izzie Swan had put a spell on me and I was powerless against her charms.

He sighed and looked at the pile of charts that was beginning to resemble a stack of library books.

"Like I said I better go. I don't want to get on Cullen's bad side, something about him seems off. He's so pale and kind of odd. He gives me the creeps."

I snorted gathering up the charts and began to make my rounds. Karl wasn't wrong. There was definitely something peculiar about Dr. Cullen, but hey he was my boss and who was I to judge.

EPOV

"Oh I am so happy. Carlisle finally decided that we could all go to the benefit for the hospital this weekend. I can't wait to go shopping for a new outfit and show off my dance moves in the competition,"

My sister bounced around the room like a pixie. She'd been looking for Carlisle's decision on the matter all week. I guess he'd finally made a decisive decision.

"Don't you ever get tired of your wife's incessant chatter Jasper?" I bit out through clenched teeth. I'd been sitting on the sofa engrossed in medical journal content in being alone, until Alice and Jasper had entered the room.

Jasper just laughed.

"Calm down buddy, you're just cranky because you haven't hunted in a while. I'll round up Emmett and we'll all go snag some grizzly."

I sighed. I knew that my lack of hunting was not the only thing making me cranky.

It was three days ago and I'd been at a local bookstore. As soon as I'd entered I knew something was different. I immediately caught a drift of her soft floral scent as it wafted up and down the aisles of the massive three story retail outlet. It was a scent that I hadn't caught a whiff of in almost five years, but would know it anywhere. My throat burned thirstily at just a smallest twinge of that familiar mouthwatering aroma. There was no doubt in my mind. Bella Swan had been here or was still here.

My heart stopped as I quickly scanned the entire first floor for any sign of her. I couldn't see her. The past five years had been and unending nightmare living without the woman I loved. But it had been for her own safety and well being that I had left. Although I was curious as to why she was in this bookstore in this town I knew I should not pursue it. I knew I should leave as quickly as possible and pretend I was never here. Alas, I knew that now that I'd caught wind of her scent that I wouldn't be satisfied until I saw her.

I searched the entire store, she wasn't there. I couldn't catch word of her in anyone's thoughts. But why would I? She had probably come in bought a book and left. Nothing significant about that would stick in anyone's mind. I had to know more. Why was she here? Was she just passing through or did she live nearby? I had to find out!

As soon as I arrived home I did a massive computer search. I had checked Forks high school graduation records that had stated where each student was attending college the following fall. Next to Isabella Swan it listed undecided. No help there. After that I started a mad search of all the college campuses in the area. I had searched all the undergraduate enrollment records that I could hack into and come up empty.

I sat back in my chair and tried one last effort. I typed the name Isabella Swan into the Google home page search engine. And there it was staring me right in the face. Graduating class of 2008 University of Portland Isabella Swan. I did the math. That only gave her 3 years of school. How did she graduate so quickly? I began searching graduate school records and found that she was enrolled in the world studies and languages graduate program. She had been right under our noses for almost a year now and no one had noticed.

I was overwhelmed with feelings. I wanted very much too see her, to hold her to be with her and tell her I was sorry. I wanted to tell her that it was a mistake and beg her forgiveness. I yearned to ask her to allow me back into her heart even though I knew wholeheartedly that I was unworthy of her love and always had been. I also knew that if I interrupted her life right now that it would not do her any good. What's best for Bella is that I stayed away. I would have to inform Carlisle and we need to make a decision on whether or not we should stay in Portland.

Carlisle and I agreed when I told him of her presence that we should relocate, but the rest of the family disagreed. It had been a little less than a year since our most recent move from Maine and my brothers and sisters did not want to re-start high school a second time this year. Alice and I hadn't started yet as we played the younger siblings so it made no difference to either of us. Alice though was jumping for joy at the thought of seeing Bella again as was Esme. Hell even Emmett wanted to see her. Rose was the only one who'd agreed that I should stay out of her life. Eventually Carlisle agreed that we would stay as long as I was comfortable with it. I agreed for the sake of my family that and the fact that even though I knew it was wrong, more than anything I wanted to see Bella.

Bella's POV

Where is that book? I looked around my cramped apartment frantically. There were books scattered everywhere. I had a paper due Monday and I couldn't find the book I needed for the last section.

"That's it I give up!" I cried and grabbed the keys to my somewhat new silver Impala. I would have to repurchase the book and worry about finding the other one later.

I drove quickly over to my favorite bookstore. I ran in, located the book I needed and was out within a matter of minutes. I drove straight home to finish working on the paper. Ordinarily I would not have put the paper off this long but I had been taking dance lessons with my boyfriend Jim (his idea not mine) for some dance competition this weekend at some hospital benefit. I wasn't really too excited to be dancing in front of a couple hundred people but it was for charity and Jim was very excited. He was always doing nice things for me so when he asked me I couldn't say no. I'd had dance lessons and a child and had actually been pretty good for all my clumsiness, although most of that awkward shyness and clumsy behavior had been left behind in Forks. I found that once I was away from people (if you could call vampires people) that were good at absolutely everything I was much more comfortable in my own human skin. Over the past several years I had transformed from a young, shy, naïve clumsy girl to a more mature, confident, somewhat cynical woman.

It still hurt to think about my reasons for leaving Forks. I had been undeniably insanely in love with a vampire named Edward Cullen. He'd left me abruptly at the beginning of senior year and it had taken a long time for my heart to heal. I wasn't sure it ever completely would heal, but it was much better now. I only thought of him a couple times a day instead of him plaguing my entire existence. Although on the outside I seemed to be quite perfect, charming, bubbly, confident and fun, on the inside it still hurt sometimes to think of my life before Portland.

I had been still terribly distraught when I finally chose a university three weeks before school started. When I first arrived here I was lonely and timid. That changed soon after I met my two current best friends, Haley and Veronica. Things had certainly changed since then. Veronica was a party girl. She reminded me a lot of Alice Cullen my former best friend only she was human. She always had the craziest ideas and Haley and I usually ended up along for the ride. Most times we were skeptical of her crazy schemes but we almost always had fun. Since I'd met those two I had become far less shy. That combined with a little alcohol and I'd found that I was quite the life of the party.

If it hadn't been for the two of them I never would have met Jim. It had been my second year at U of P and it was another one of Veronica's crazy ideas. She thought it would be funny to go up onto the roof of the dorms and throw snowballs at the guys from the dorm across from us. As it turns out she forgot to leave a piece of wood in the door and we were stuck up there all night in the frigid 20 degree temperature. By the time someone found us the next day we all needed to be brought to the hospital to be checked for hypothermia. The EMT who brought us in was Jim. He was very handsome and my friends thought he was into me. He checked up on me in my hospital room several times before asking shyly for my phone number. I was about to say no when Veronica yelled it out at the top of her lungs. I was deeply embarrassed.

I was stunned when he'd actually called the next day to see how I was and ask if he could take me to dinner when I was feeling better. We'd hit it off and been together ever since. Being with Jim was easy. He was so fun and lighthearted. Sometimes when I was with him I was almost able to imagine that Edward Cullen had never existed, almost.

**So all you Edward & Bella fans out there please let me know if you are interested in reading more! If so I would be happy to post another chapter by the end of tomorrow! **

**Also Team Jacob fans be warned. I hate that smelly dog and he will not be making any large appearances in this fic. **


	2. Chapter 2: Why Can't I Love Him?

**Chapter 2: Why Can't I Love Him?**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or Edward. Stephenie Meyer owns all except for my Edward cutout and numerous Edward posters=)**

Jim

After a long, grueling night at work, I returned home to my apartment that I shared with my old college buddy Nick. It sucked to be nearly thirty years old and still living with my college roommate. Izzie and I had spoken briefly about us moving in together, but as usual she shut me down rather quickly saying that she enjoyed living alone for once in her life and that it was moving too fast for her. I had dropped the subject and hadn't brought it up since.

Izzie never made life easy. She was very complicated and I wanted desperately to understand her odd behavior and unique point of vue. She was definitely not one for being too open with her emotions. I had a feeling that most of her fears of intimacy had come from whatever had gone down in her home town before she entered college. I had brought up her past a few times and she had told me bits and pieces but had been quite curt. She'd said she had been dating someone, she didn't give a name or description just that it was a very serious relationship that had ended badly. She said she was very hurt and it took a long time for her to get over it. She insisted that she had in fact gotten over it. Sometimes I wasn't so sure.

Wasn't it some sort of unwritten rule that most girls wanted their boyfriends to devote all of their spare time to them, tell them they loved them, be intimate with them, move in with them and eventually marry them. It was in this way that Izzie Swan was different from most other women. She had insisted that she was very comfortable with our relationship just the way it was and that if we truly cared deeply for each other then why complicate things with marriage and living situations. Her excuses had sounded rational to me a year ago, but to be honest since then I'd been hoping for something more. I know most guys would kill to be in this situation, but I was nearly thirty and ready to settle down.

One night about six months after our first date we'd gone out. She was sitting across the table from me at La Fiesta, a Mexican joint we frequented for quesadillas and margaritas. We were talking about the usual school, work etc… and I couldn't help myself. She was being so well for lack of a better word so Izzie. That night I'd said it, the three words that most women can't wait to hear from their steady boyfriends.

"I love you Izzie." I had said

She had nearly choked on her quesadilla. After she'd drunk some water and had stopped coughing, she'd looked at me her eyes wide for just a second and then she went right back on talking about some paper she had due the next day like I hadn't said a word. I was hurt and a little disappointed at her reaction, but I wasn't going to make a big deal out of it at a restaurant. The ride home was extremely awkward. We'd rode in silence most of the way. When we neared her dorm she spoke softly.

" I'm sorry about earlier. This is moving a little to fast for me and I'm scared that if I don't say anything we won't be together anymore, but if I do say something I might not be saying it and meaning it."

She was looking down at her seatbelt. I'd felt like a rotten jerk that night. It had after all only been six months and she was a few years younger than I was so I'd decided not to push her. She'd tell me when she was ready I assured myself. That theory came and went a long time ago.

We'd come a long way since then. She never had said I love you back, but she was okay with me saying it. Her usual response was a genuine smile and a quick I know. She frequently said she appreciated me and to me that was usually enough, but for some reason lately I'd been longing to hear her say it just once to me and to mean it. I sighed. Lately we'd been having a really great time dancing and laughing and talking The three time a week dance tutorials I'd insisted we sign up for, so that we wouldn't make asses of ourselves this Saturday at the benefit seemed to be just what we'd needed to spice things up a little.

She had protested the lessons at first but agreed grudgingly. After the first one she loosened up and we had a lot of fun. I'd hate to see that end. After nearly two years she was finally beginning to seem content without distraction. Give it another six months and I think she'll be ready. I thought to myself as I changed out of my work clothes and into my more comfortable dance attire.

Bella

Again I was rushing around. I couldn't find my leotard. We were going to be late for dance class again. I was running late as usual. I was supposed to meet Jim at the studio at 7. It was five to 7 now and I still couldn't find it. I did another mad dash around the apartment and finally saw the edge of it sticking out of my bottom dresser drawer. Now how did it get in there I thought. Whatever I'm late and it doesn't matter.

I rushed down the stairs and into my Impala. I was so glad not to be driving my old Chevy truck. It was a thousand years old and although Jacob had put many continuous hours into keeping it up it had finally died. I was paying little attention to the road when suddenly out of the corner of my eye I thought I saw a tall figure with pale, granite skin and just a glimpse of that wild bronze hair. My heart skipped a beat. Was he here in Portland? I knew I was late already but I couldn't help but pursuing this ridiculous notion that somehow Edward was here in Portland. I turned down the street where I thought I saw him. OF course I didn't see him. What did I just think he was going to be standing there against his shiny silver Volvo like nothing had happened? I must be out of my mind. Bella you're being completely ridiculous. I told myself. He's not here, you're late for dance class and Jim isn't going to be happy.

I turned around and headed in the direction of the dance studio. Get a grip Bella. You were doing so well. Another year or so and maybe I'd forget him altogether. Fat chance! I thought shaking my head. The reality was that I'd probably never get over Edward Cullen. My life was doomed.

Edward

I knew I shouldn't have but I did. I looked up her address in Portland and I went to her house. I watched through the window as she ran frantically around the bedroom. Seeing her even from a distance made my dead heart almost want to beat. She was looking for something and getting more and frustrated by the minute. She glanced at her watch sighed and started looking again. She found it. A piece of black clothing she'd been searching for. She threw it in her bag and grabbed her keys. She ran out the door so fast she forgot to lock it. She got into a silver Chevy Impala and sped away. I was relieved to see that she wasn't driving that death trap anymore. I ran after her keeping to the shadows. I wasn't sure why but I just had to know where she was going in such a hurry. She passed an intersection and for a split second she looked in my direction.

Her eyes flew wide open and she opened her mouth in shock. "Shit!" Had she seen me? I moved with lightening speed, but I think she saw me. I climbed to the top of a tall building and watched her from there. She turned her car down the street I'd been on and drove slowly. She was looking for me. I held my breath (as if I had any) After a minute she shook her head slowly and turned her car back onto the main road.

I wanted to continue following her but I didn't want to chance her seeing me again. Maybe she would think her mind was playing tricks on her this once, but if she saw me twice she was too smart not to figure out that I was following her.

Jim

I'd been at the dance studio for nearly twenty minutes when she finally arrived. She was flushed pink like she'd been running and she looked flustered.

"Jim I'm so sorry I'm late she said apologetically. I couldn't find my leotard."

I laughed heartily. One of the things I loved most about her was that her apartment was total chaos. Nothing was every where it should be. Once she'd even found her car keys in the freezer.

"It's okay," I said crossing the room.

"Calm down." I put my hands around her and pulled her close to me for a kiss, but instead of relaxing into my arms like she usually did she stiffened slightly and pulled away insisting she had to get changed.

The entire night while we were dancing she seemed preoccupied. She insisted it was about a paper she had due on Monday, but I wasn't buying it. Something had seriously upset her. Sometimes it bothered me that she didn't confide in me when she was upset. To tell the truth she didn't really confide in anyone. Her two closest girlfriends Haley and Veronica could attest to that. They'd lived with her three years and knew next to nothing about her life before she'd moved to Portland. 

I had once asked them point blank if they knew much about Izzie's past and if she'd told them anything about her past relationship or about her feelings for me. They said they only knew what I knew, but that she had been a wreck when she first came here and was doing much better. At the time that satisfied my curiosity, but now I had to wonder how a high school relationship could have disturbed her life that much. I had once made the mistake of asking her if the guy had hurt her physically.

Her reaction was something I'd never seen in her before, anger to the utmost degree. She had slapped me clean across the face and told me no and to never ask her something so hideous again. She had never apologized for that reaction either.

Dance class ended and I had planned a quiet dinner for two back at my place.

"How about I drive and then I can bring you to get your car later," I suggested taking her hand in mine.

She squirmed out of my grasp and mumbled something about wanting to get home and go to bed early because she had class early tomorrow. She was lying, but I didn't know why. I knew her first class on Fridays started at noon.

I didn't call her on it like I hadn't the many other times she'd made such similar excuses. Loving her had come with a whole lot of putting up with what I liked to call Izzie's quirks. I kissed her goodnight and told her I'd call her tomorrow. Maybe things weren't getting better. I thought we'd been closer than ever this week, but tonight she seemed like she was a million miles away.

Bella

The entire dance class passed by in a blur. I couldn't stop thinking about Edward. I knew I had hurt Jim when I'd refused his dinner invitation. He was so romantic and he'd been so patient with me from the start. He hadn't even pressured me to be intimate. Of course it had come up but I told him I just wasn't ready for that and that I hadn't experienced intimacy with anyone before. He has reassured me that it wasn't the most important thing in a relationship and that he would wait as long as I needed. He might be waiting forever if I couldn't get over seeing my ex-vampire everywhere. Her really was a good man for putting up with all of my bullshit. I'd have thought he'd have been gone long ago. I didn't deserve him. My cell rang and it snapped me back to reality.

The caller ID said Veronica calling.

"Izzie, Jim just called me all upset. He's really worried about you. He said you were barely coherent at dance class tonight and that you left rather abruptly. He said you guys were supposed to have dinner together. What's going on?" Veronica never beat around the bush. She was always direct. It came in handy having a friend like her that is until she was directing her fire at you.

I sighed. I couldn't explain it to her. She'd known how distraught I'd been my first year of school, but I hadn't explained much. I'd just said I'd been hurt and wasn't yet over it. I couldn't tell anyone that I couldn't possibly give my heart to anyone because I had already given it completely to someone else. Someone that I was still hopelessly in love with. Someone I was hallucinating about just this very night. If I explained even part of it now I know she'd tell Jim and they'd both think I was crazy or even worse that I was just pathetic, which I totally was. It's better if they just think I'm commitment shy.

"I'm just really stressed out right now with grad school and with this whole dance thing he wants me to do. I've just been feeling overwhelmed lately and I need to get some sleep or I'm going to implode."

I wasn't really lying to my best friend. I really did need to sleep. I was hallucinating. That wasn't normal, even for me.

"Iz can I tell you something and promise me you're not going to get angry with me?"

"Sure, you can tell me."

"Iz I think Jim wants more than this high school relationship you seem to be so content with. I think he wants to get married," She blurted out.

I was shocked into silence.

"Iz are you there?"

I found my voice. "Do you really think that he's going to propose? Did he tell you that? I thought we talked about this and he said he was happy where we were." I stammered into the phone nervously.

"Iz I think he was happy where you were, but it's been two years. The man is madly in love with you. He's allowed for your fears of intimacy, your desire to be independent and live alone, and the fact that I've never heard you tell the man you love him, he's a great guy, but even he has his limits. He's not going to wait forever. What's the problem? Don't you love him?"

And there it was right out in the open, the million dollar question. Did I love him?

I searched for something to say that wouldn't sound awful. There wasn't anything, at least anything that would be the truth.

"What do you mean do I love him? He's my boyfriend we've been together two years. If I didn't care about him I wouldn't stay with him." She was quiet for a minute.

"Iz I think you just found your answer. You can't even say you love him. You need to tell him before he goes out and does something crazy."

"Crazy like what Veronica?"

My thoughts were running wild. Had he bought a ring? Surely I thought he'd wait a little longer before jumping head first into something like that. My heart began to race.

"Iz ask yourself this question. If Jim asked you to marry him tomorrow, what would you say?"

"I don't know." I said honestly. "I do care about him deeply. I want to be with him. He makes me laugh and I love spending time together, but I'm just not sure I'm ready for marriage. I'm only 23. Why do people always have to be in such a rush to do things? Why is taking things slowly always considered the wrong thing?" I was steamed by this point.

"My parents rushed into marriage and it only lasted about a year. "

"Look Iz I'm not telling you to end it. I'm just saying that I wouldn't be surprised if he ends it when you say no to his proposal."

"Ver he didn't actually buy a ring did he?" I asked in horror.

"Not that I'm aware of, but he has been asking questions about your jewelry preferences specifically what cut of diamond you might like."

I groaned throwing myself down on the bed. Why couldn't I just love him back? Why didn't I feel that way? Every other girl in the entire world was entirely envious of my boyfriend. He was sweet, kind, thoughtful, romantic, patient, had a great job, was very handsome and treated me with love and respect. Any girl would kill to have what I had and I was going to throw it down the tubes as usual. Good one Bella.

**Haha so does anyone think Bella is an idiot for not loving Jim or that Jim is an idiot for staying with Bella? **

**Please review. I'd like to know if anyone is reading. Shout outs to my first four reviewers. Vamp1001, Lulubelle09, Carafina, and Verox29 You're awesome! **


	3. Chapter 3: Peeping Edward

**Chapter 3: Peeping Edward**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. Stephenie Meyer owns all. **

Edward

I felt as I had back in Forks when I'd climb in her bedroom window at her father's house. I felt like a peeping tom, but I had to see her. I had to be near her. It had been far too long since I'd inhaled her sent and it sent glorious burning down my throat and the venom pooled hungrily in my mouth as I shut the window silently behind me. I had forgotten how appealing her blood was to me and why I had left her in the first place.  
Didn't I want her to have a normal life? One where she could meet someone, settle down and have a family. Of course that is what I should want, but I was a selfish creature and what I wanted even more than that was to take her back, to claim Bella Swan as my own and tell her that leaving had been a huge mistake, that I was sorry and then beg at her feet for her to forgive me. I hated myself for being so weak, but I couldn't stay away from her. These last five years had been the worse of my existence. The pain had been so excruciating. Every time I closed my eyes I could think of nothing but her sweet angelic face. Thoughts of her plagued my mind night and day nearly driving me to the brink of insanity.

I sat on a chair on the other side of the room just watching her sleep. She had become even more beautiful than she had been in her teenage years. Bella Swan had turned into a breathtakingly beautiful woman. Her long hair now glossy and wavy hung halfway down her back, her brown eyes still deep, but now wiser, her soft lips still begged for me to kiss her. She was still very thin but had some semblance of a womanly figure. Her body had matured quite nicely in the past five years. Oh yea I surely qualified as a voyeur. When I'd seen her the other day I'd realized she'd changed quite a bit in a subtle way from the shy, clumsy, teenager she'd been back in Forks. She now wore make-up and dressed to accentuate her femininity as well. Alice would definitely approve of her new more grown-up wardrobe.

Alice had seen me here I was sure of it, but she had not said a word. It was unlike her to keep a vision to herself especially when it concerned Bella. This unnerved me a little the more I thought about it. Was there something she didn't want me to know? The sun was almost up and Bella began to stir. Although she's been restless she hadn't spoken in her sleep, but as she stirred I heard the one thing I thought I'd never hear from her sweet voice again." Edward," My name escaped her lips. I couldn't help myself from grinning from ear to ear. She still loves me. I thought or at least she still thinks of me. I quickly vacated the same way I'd come and ran all the way home. I was as giddy as a schoolboy with a crush, but I didn't care. The woman I loved had not forgotten me. The hope swelled inside me as I skipped through the front door of our home.

You look chipper said Rosalie with evident disgust.

Bella still loves him chirped Alice darting across the room to where I was standing.

She put her arm around my shoulder. "Edward," She said. "If you are going to see Bella and you want her back in you life then you better move quickly. She looked me square in the eye.

"What, why what do you mean Alice?" I tried to invade her thoughts but she was reciting the French national Anthem in her head over and over.

"Just hurry," She stated as she flitted out of the room.

"Don't look at me," said Rosalie snidely. "You know I have to patience for that human you're so taken with."

I gave her a glare ready to fight her if she said one more thing. She glared back with a snarl.

Just then Esme came into the room she looked at us and shook her head. "Behave yourselves you're in your golden years and you still act like children." She tisked.

Rosalie rolled her eyes and left the room.

Esme came over and put her arm around me

"Edward we know your reasons for leaving Forks, but we all think that Bella would be much better off if you didn't make her decisions for her. She has a right to know you're watching her and that you still love her. She needs to make the choice herself. If she doesn't then she will never be able to live that full human life you're always talking about for her."

I sighed. I knew Esme was right, but how would I tell her that? How would I be able to approach her after all these years? What would her reaction be? Would she forgive me or was it too late? Was there someone else who had captured her heart or would she give it back to me as readily as she had before? So many questions floated around in my head and I had no clue as to what the answers would be.

"She'll forgive you Son, take you back? I don't know, but Bella is a kind person, she will forgive you. Go to her," My mother urged.

Was Esme right? Would she forgive me?

Carlisle returned from work a short time later.

"I hope everyone is getting ready the benefit is in a few hours. I want my family to look their best and represent us with dignity. And no screwing around," He said raising his eyebrow at us. In his mind he was thinking of Emmett and Alice and their shenanigans.

Everyone was already upstairs putting on their Sunday best in order to impress the hospital benefactors. I ran quickly to get ready as well. I wasn't too thrilled that Carlisle had insisted that I escort Tanya Denali to this benefit. Although it would be rude of us to exclude her seeing that she was visiting for the weekend. I think Carlisle was still hoping that I'd find a mate in her. Not a chance of that now that I knew Bella was here.

Jim

I got into the car and started to drive over to pick Izzie up. I had called Veronica last night to see if she could find out what was wrong with her, but to no avail. The only thing she'd come back with is that she didn't think that proposing right now would be a good idea. That Izzie had said that twenty-three was too young to be married. That helped me a little. Maybe I was smothering her. I keep forgetting the age difference. Being that I was almost seven years older than her. I had to think back to when I was her age. At that time the thought of marriage was quite scary to me as well. If I back off a little she'll relax and everything will be okay I decided.

I pulled up in front of her place and she surprised me by slamming the door behind her and flying down the stairs to greet me at the car. She was usually running late, but here she was all dressed and ready to go on time. Maybe she really had needed the sleep she claimed she'd needed last night. She smiled genuinely at me as I opened the passenger door for her. It was rare that I got to drive her anywhere. She preferred to drive separately or to be the driver. That was yet another one of her notorious quirks.

"You look beautiful," I said kissing her cheek lightly as she took my hand so I could help her into the car. She was wearing a new dress that in my opinion would turn every man's head tonight.

"Thanks," She said blushing. The drive to the benefit was actually quite pleasant.

"Sorry about last night." She said looking at me earnestly.

"I've just been off my game lately with school, this dance stuff, lack of sleep. I hope you're not mad at me?" She looked at my questioningly with those beautiful brown eyes.

"Of course not I said. I could never be mad at you." I took her hand in mine and brought it up to my lips and kissed it gently.

She giggled. "You never cease to amaze me. After all the havoc I've wreaked on this relationship and you're still putting up with me. I'm so lucky to have someone like you." She smiled at me.

My heart skipped a beat. She really did sound like she meant it. Maybe talking it out with Veronica last night helped. She's just scared that's all give it time. I reassured myself as we pulled up to the hotel where the benefit was being held. I helped her out of the car and handed my keys to the valet.

Edward

We made it to the hotel and found our table. Tanya had joined us at the front door. She looked absolutely stunning as usual her long, strawberry blonde hair swept up elegantly. She never disappointed with her beauty. I complimented her quickly on her dress and escorted her to the table as if she were truly my date. She was a nice girl and I couldn't bear the thought of hurting her feelings anymore than I already had in the past. I knew that she thought we were a perfect match and that she wanted me to want her, but I had told her quite bluntly in the past that she deserved better. I could not give her what she truly deserved. She had taken my rejection quite eloquently, but still kept up hope that some day I would change my mind. I cursed Carlisle silently for forcing her upon me this night. I didn't want to lead her on. It wasn't fair to raise her hopes especially since Bella was within my reach again. If only she would forgive me. I was extremely on edge and I wasn't good company.

I went to the bar and brought back two glasses of Champagne. They were only props for us, but were very important at these functions. We already stood out by our flawless beauty and unchanging pale skin we did not need to draw anymore attention to ourselves than necessary. I was a little surprised that Carlisle had allowed us to come. I could see in his mind that it would be more problematic if he tried to hide his family from his colleagues. We'd been here nearly a year and we had made ourselves as scarce as possibly unless it was when my brothers and sister were at school. I saw his point and it didn't usually bother me. It was beginning to though. I wanted to show myself to Bella badly.

Bella

We walked through the doors into the ballroom where the event was taking place. I was in awe of the massive amount of money spent on an even meant to raise money for charity. There were opulent chandeliers, thick deep red carpets, and the fixtures on the walls seemed to belong in a chateau. The table settings were just as elegant as the rest of the room as well. Jim escorted me through the door and we found our seating arrangement near the back of the far side of the room. We joined some of his friends from the hospital and Haley and her current boyfriend Dylan.

"Wow your dress looks fabulous," Haley commented as we approached our seats.  
"Thanks," I said blushing. I was still a little bit uncomfortable in such high heels and the dress that Veronica had helped me pick out was a little low cut for my taste. It was a glittery halter style that flattered my shoulders and it was clingy at the waist and flowed until it was a few inches above the knee. She'd insisted on this dress because it would twirl nicely around me during the dance competition. I was suddenly nervous, more so than I'd been in a long time. I had overcome the majority of my clumsiness, but would I be able to dance in front of this many people? I looked around the room and suddenly my head started to swim.

"You look a little faint Izzie are you okay?" Jim put his hand on my shoulder and looked into my eyes.

"I'm just a little nervous," I said biting my lip. "What if I fall?"

"You won't fall. We've rehearsed this a million times. And even if you do I'll be there to catch you," He said his eyes shining with love for me. That made me feel even worse. He was just so sweet.

I knew what he said was true we were very well rehearsed and everything was going to go well, but I couldn't shake this sudden feeling of apprehension as I took a sip of ice water out of one of the elegant crystal goblets on our table.

**So How do you think Bella will react upon seeing Edward again and vice versa? Let me know what you think and if you want to read more. Tell your friends to read lol… It doesn't seem like people are that interested. Believe me it gets way better this is just the intro. Thanks for reading!**


	4. Chapter 4: Graceful as a Swan

**Chapter 4: Graceful as a Swan**

**Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Stephenie Meyer no copyright infringement or monitary gain intended. **

Edward

Sitting through these dinners was almost maddening for me. As usual they served many courses starting with a thick soup and then a salad followed by some oddly prepared rubbery chicken slopped in butter. It smelled awful and the thought of having to force down any of it disgusted me, but for Carlisle's sake I mustered up the courage to fork down a few bites of each course eagerly awaiting a minute alone to purge it from my body.

"Don't play with your food so much Edward," Snapped Rosalie under her breath just quietly enough that the humans wouldn't hear her harsh tone.  
I looked across the table at her. I knew she was just as disgusted as I was to have to eat human food, but she was much more graceful in her eating habits than I. She would cut a piece of meat into the tiniest piece possible hold it in her mouth a few seconds and then pretend to blot her lips with her napkin while casual spitting the piece of meat into it. If it weren't such a feminine action I might try it.

Emmett was far less casual about it. He would take gigantic bites and not as casually spit some into a napkin and others he would swallow with a grimace.

I sighed gratefully when they'd cleared the last plate and I didn't have the constant reminder in front of me of what I would be hacking up later. Tanya's thoughts were also getting on my nerves a little.

She'd been thinking of ways to ask me to dance with her all night. Ways in which she would get me alone and then her fantasies of what we would do after we were alone were enough to make even the toughest man blush. She was quite insatiable this one. It was hard for me to maintain my composure while she was thinking these things. It was making me very uncomfortable and I wished that I could take her out back and lock her in a closet or some other holding chamber while I spent the rest of the evening pretending to listen to silly humans babble about their latest cause and applaud when my father went up to announce our family's contribution to the foundation.

Jasper who was sitting to my right looked tense. I knew it was tough for him to be around all of these people and I could hear his thoughts.

_I just fed. I'm full. Even if I wanted to hurt someone which I don't, I wouldn't have the room for their blood. It's as simple as that. I won't feed because I'm not thirsty_.

He kept repeating the phrase I'm full, I'm full in his head.

I felt sorry for the guy. He was trying to do the right thing, but I knew it was ten times harder for him than any of us to his harsh background. I gave him an encouraging smile and he smiled back. He knew I could hear him and for that I was even sorrier.

I tuned in to the thoughts of the rest of my family. Carlisle was going over his speech in his head. He was not concerned with the words, but with the delivery. He needed to appear human, he was figuring out at what intervals he would fidget, inhale, exhale and adjust his reading glasses of which we all knew he didn't need, again a prop.

Rosalie as usual was thinking about how good she looked in her new designer dress. She was comparing her beauty to that of the other women in the room. As usual she thought herself the most equisite creature to ever walk the earth. It was typical Rosalie.

I moved on to Emmett. He was thinking about his last hunting trip when a particularly ferocious grizzly had gotten the jump on him for a few minutes. He was trying to think of a tactic to out wit the next one. Every few minutes or so he would look over at Rose and contemplate sneaking out with her back to the hotel room to have sex.  
I gave him a swift kick under the table. He quickly looked away from Rose and began focusing his thoughts back on the grizzly.

I switched to Alice maybe she would hold my interest for a while we were the only two that could converse almost without words because of her visions and my mind-reading.

She was focusing on the dance competition. She had wanted to enter quite badly, but Carlisle had thought it a bad idea to draw unnecessary attention to our graceful and flawless dance maneuvers. She was pouting and concentrating hard on who the winner of the contest would be. If it wasn't going to be her, then it would have to be someone just as good. I shook my head. Alice would not be my cure for boredom at the moment.

I focused in on Esme. She was likely to be thinking about the architecture of the building or how she would remodel it if she had the chance, but not today. She was slowly translating the Illiad from English to Greek. There was only one reason she would be doing this.,to keep me out. I met her gaze and she looked at me with wide eyes. She was now even more intent on the task at hand. She was going faster now trying hard not to break concentration. I looked at Alice questioningly. She looked up from her deep concentration on the dance contest glanced at Esme and then looked at me with confusion.

Then her eyes went wide and she started running nursery rimes in her head. Hey diddle diddle the cat and the fiddle the cow jumped over the moon.

Now I was worried. Was something bad going to happen? Were they just trying to keep whatever it was from me and how did Esme know what it was before Alice? I swept my eyes around the room looking for anything out of the ordinary, but nothing seemed to be out of place. Just an enormous amount of annoying humans prattling on about their hum drum lives, nothing of real interest. That is until the next couple got up on the platform to compete.

At first they looked average with their backs turned to the audience. As the music of Michael Buble and Save the Last Dance began to float through the room, the spotlight hit the couple as they moved quite rhythmically to the music. I stared at the familiarity of the girls figure and hair. And then he spun her around her pink dress twirling in circles and her scent hit me like a slap in the face. It was Bella. She was up on the stage dancing in another man's arms. Close enough to discover me sitting here if she looked out into the crowd. I couldn't tear my eyes away from her. I vaguely heard my family's concern for me and their fear of my reaction and that of Bella if she saw me.

They were also in awe as was I of her beauty and gracefulness. She was no longer awkward and clumsy. She was as graceful as irony would have it as a swan. She was so beautiful, who was this guy she was dancing with. He looked at her with such love in his eyes. I tried to hear his thoughts, but he was concentrating only on the dance moves and not on the angel he was holding in his arms. My angel! My heart burned with rage and desire. Rage that she was not dancing with me and that she was allowing his hands all over her. I wanted to crush his bones to dust. I desired to run to her and wrap her in my arms, kiss her neck, inhale her scent…"

Alice kicked my chair snapping me back to reality.

Stop thinking that she said sternly.

I looked wistfully at the stage as the music ended and they took their seats. She hadn't noticed us sitting here. Of course she hadn't the lights up there were probably blinding.

The next couple took the stage and I turned my attention to my family. They were staring at me with impatience to see what I was going to do.

_Go to her son let her know you're here._ Thought Esme. She smiled at my encouragingly.

_How did she pull that outfit and those dance moves off? She used to be so clumsy._ Rosalie was slightly jealous that Bella had become more beautiful, graceful and quite sophisticated.

Jasper was looking pained as he sent calming waves at me to ease the tension that was flowing through my corpse.

Alice was giddy with excitement. "Can I talk to Bella tonight?" She asked.

I glared at her. " She doesn't know we are here." I hissed.

_She will in about a minute_ Carlisle thought as he looked at the podium in the front of the room. He would be making his speech as soon as this dance was over.

_I have to go up there son it wouldn't be right if I backed out now. We all agreed we didn't want to move. Let's just make the best of this. She's a bright girl she won't make a scene. _

Carlisle was right and in a twisted way I wanted her to know I was here.

Bella

I was out of breath and slightly exhilarated. I had floated easily through the dance number like it was a piece of cake. Jim had been right. There had been nothing to be nervous about. We exited the stage and he escorted me back to our seat.

"You were absolutely fabulous," Haley beamed.

"Stellar," Said Dylan.

I could feel myself blushing a deep crimson. I felt light as air and a little woozy from the excitement.

"I think I need a drink," I said looking at Jim.

His soft blue eyes crinkled in a smile. "Champagne for my lady?" He asked.

"Yes please."

He was back in two shakes of a lion's tale with two glasses of champagne. We took our seats. I had been so nervous at dinner that I had barely eaten a thing. My stomach wasn't going to have much of a cushion for the alcohol. I downed it quickly anyways .

"Ready for another so soon?" Jim laughed.

"Sorry to make you get up again I'll go," I offered.  
"Not on your life," He said. "Be back in a flash."

He was so sweet. I kept trying to imagine him proposing to me and me saying yes. But I just couldn't. Something wouldn't let me. I wanted so much to be normal and fall in love again, but my heart wouldn't let go of Edward. "Stupid shiny Volvo owner." I muttered.

Jim came back and started talking excitedly.

"After this dance my boss is going to get up and give a speech." He said. "The guy is a legend around here I guess."

"What does that mean?" I asked.

"Well he's only been here about a year and already he's made chief of staff. He's the most skilled surgeon in the hospital, he's only about thirty, but looks like he could be twenty-five, he looks perfect all the time although he barely eats or sleeps. He's got this weird family." He went on, but I'd stopped listening.

"Weird family." I laughed. "What do you mean weird?" People could be so critical when it came to judging others.

"Well he's only like thirty and he and his wife have like five adopted children who are all in high school I guess. They're like mentors to them or something. The way he speaks about them it's like they're his real kids though."

My mind raced, five kids, all in high school, doesn't eat, doesn't sleep, surgeon, only thirty. My head started to spin.

I glanced over to the podium as they made the announcement.

"And now I'd like to introduce the creator of our foundation and chief of staff here at Portland Community Hospital, Dr. Carlisle Cullen."

My face went white. I dropped my champagne glass and it shattered all over the table as I watched Carlisle walk up to the podium. His eyes briefly met mine as he began his speech. My mouth was wide open as I gaped at him from my seat.

"Iz are you okay? Izzy can you hear me? Did the glass cut you? Izzy answer me." I could hear Jim's voice in the background, but I couldn't focus on it. My eyes scanned the room searching for the family that had left me five years ago. Near the far front corner of the room is where I saw him. I saw them all of them. They were all focusing on Carlisle's speech, all but him. He was staring straight at me. His golden eyes and granite skin, bronze tousled hair, he looked exactly the same. They all did. My mouth was still hanging open. He was mouthing something to me.

I think it was Room 307. Meet me there. I nodded unconsciously.

Someone was shaking me, grabbing me. I was pulled back to reality.

I looked down at the table glass was shattered all over the beige linen table cloth.  
I looked up into Jim's eyes. They were wide and full of concern.

"Iz you've been out of it for a few minutes now are you okay. What happened?"

I scrambled for something to say. Something that would make sense." I guess I felt a little faint," I said which was absolutely the truth. "I didn't eat much at dinner I was too nervous," I admitted. Also true, but definitely not the reason I was so on edge." I think I should go splash some cool water on my face," I said standing up from the table abruptly. Carlisle was just finishing his speech as I made a hasty exit to the ladies room.

I slipped inside quickly and leaned heavily against the sink. I turned on the faucet and ran my hands under the cool water splashing a little on the back of my neck. I raised my eyes to the mirror slowly to check out the damage and was startled to see another pale white face standing behind me in the mirror. 

"Alice!"

"Hi Bella. How are you?" She crooned gleefully. She threw her arms around me and hugged me to the point of suffocation.  
"Alice, need air," I gasped.

She let go and looked at me with a smile. "Love the dress Bella and you are so going to win that contest. You were so fabulous. Although if you and that guy do win, Edward will probably hit the roof."

She chattered on buoyantly. "He couldn't take his eyes off you at one point he imagined grinding that guys bones into dust," She stopped when she saw the horrified expression that had taken over my facial features.

"Sorry I should have kept that one to myself."

"Why are you here?" I stammered.

"We live here silly. What are you doing here?"

"I go to school here. You didn't know?" I raised my eyebrows and gave her a knowing stare.

"Ok Ok I knew, but only for about a week. We didn't know you were here until last week when Edward went out to the bookstore. He came back looking like he'd been hit with a wrecking ball. He said he smelled you. He said you must have already left because he couldn't find you in there."

I remembered that day. I'd just run into the store for a minute to get a book I needed for an assignment. How close I'd been to seeing him again.

"So I did see him in the alley the other night," I mused thoughtfully. My heart rate had slowed to an almost normal pace and I was starting to feel the color come back to my cheeks.

"Yea, he thought you might have seen him. He's getting sloppy that brother of mine."

"So who's the guy?" She blurted

"Who you mean Jim?" I asked knowing full well that she knew more than she let on.

"Who else Bella?"

"He's my boyfriend," I managed.

"So you're not engaged then?" She asked her eyes narrowing in suspicion.

"No what would make you think that?" I asked.

"Nothing." She said quietly. "Just wondering."

"You saw him proposing didn't you?" I asked My heart started to race again.

"Calm down Bella. I saw your answer. I know you won't marry him." She stated matter of factly.

I let out a breath. "Really I say no?" I wasn't really surprised, but hey it was good to know. 

"That surprises you?"

"Not really. What was his reaction?"

"What do you think?"

"Not good I suppose."

"When does it happen?"  
"Can't tell, but soon."

"So do you still love my brother?"

"Alice you're here for all of ten minutes in my life and already you're bombarding me with all these questions."

"It's not a hard one Bella. Do you or don't you still love my brother?"

"He left me to die in the woods Alice. You left without saying goodbye. What do you want me to feel? Hurt betrayed, empty, alone, worthless, cast off like some unwanted dust rag, the pathetic human that you all used for your own amusement." I spat. I was raging and unable to control myself, I couldn't stop myself. I collapsed to the floor, my body wracked with sobs. "Why didn't he love me?" I gasped.

She was quick as she ran to lock the door she then knelt down beside me and held me in her cold hard arms. Her skin felt icy against my heated skin.  
"Whatever do you mean you silly girl. He left you to save your life. He left because he loves you so much that he'd rather cause himself unbearable pain for the rest of his existence being away from you than to see you die at his hands or at those of one of our kind."

I gasped at her words. He really did love me.

Just then there was a banging on the door. "Alice what are you doing in there? Bring Bella out this instant. Her friends are just about to come looking for her."

Edward it was my Edward at the door. The one I'd prayed and hoped would return to me. I untangled myself from Alice and threw myself against the door. I wretched it open to find Edward pacing outside. He looked at me as I flung open the door.  
I must be a mess I thought. My eyes and nose red and puffy from crying, my make-up smeared, my hair tousled. His gaze met mine and I was done worrying about what I looked like. He stood just a few feet from me with his golden eyes burning into mine. His lips curved up into the crooked smile that I'd known and loved so dearly.

I ran to him and flung myself into his cold arms. He swept me off my feet in a tender hug crushing my body to his as he swept me up into his arms.

**Wow that was long. I hope you like it! Sorry if there are typos. It is late and I am very tired. Review if you want more please.**


	5. Chapter 5: Reunited

**Chapter 5: Reunited**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight **

**I know I abandoned this story. Much of it is written, but not edited and it takes a long time because when I wrote this I had no idea how to do quotations and the entire thing is a huge mess. I will update as much as I can, but it will probably not be often, but if you are still interested I will post.**

**Edward**

I watched for her reaction as they announced that Carlisle would be making his speech. Upon hearing his name her face went white, she looked over at the podium saw Carlisle and the Champagne glass that was in her hand fell shattering all over the table. She didn't even flinch. Her heart was beating rapidly and her breathing was ragged. Her eyes darted frantically around the room trying to ascertain our location. My heart soared at the fact that thoughts of me could still fluster her. That meant I still had a chance. If she was over me, she'd be much calmer. My family was well aware of what was going on, but tried their best to look inconspicuous as they tuned their attention in to Carlisle's speech. I however continued to stare at Bella. I didn't care if people thought I was a creep. I needed her to look at me.

Her eyes found our table and she gaped at us with her mouth wide open and her eyes wide. It took all my strength to retrain myself to my seat. I wanted to jump up run across the room, grab her and never look back. Jasper looked to be focusing on the speech, but was frantically sending me calming waves.

"Calm down man. Don't be so obvious," he thought.

Ignoring my brother's sage advice, I kept her gaze. I mouthed the words; "Meet me in Room 307" to her. She seemed to understand and nodded her head like a puppet. The boyfriend or whoever he was started shaking her. I wanted to break his hands for putting them on her.

She said something to him and then left her table and made her way out of the room quickly. He wanted to follow her but decided it would be smothering her and resisted.  
Chump, I thought smugly. She must have said he was clingy or something.

Alice was already out of her seat and out the door by the time I turned around. She would fix this. She would go help my Bella. I vacated my seat excusing myself politely just as Carlisle returned to the table.

What was taking them so long in there? I paced impatiently back and forth outside the women's bathroom. I could hear Bella sobbing through the door.

"Why didn't he love me?"

If my heart were beating it would have stopped in an instant at her words. She really had believed all this time that I had not loved her. How could I have been such a monster to just leave her in the woods like that? The pain in her voice was heart wrenching.

When I could wait no longer, I banged on the door.

"Alice what are you doing in there? Bring Bella out this instant. Her friends are about to come looking for her," I hissed.

In the blink of an eye the door was wide open and there she was, more beautiful than ever. I ached to run to her to hold her to take the pain I'd inflicted on her away, but I couldn't move. What if she didn't want me the way I wanted her? What if she was happier without me? What if she was serious about the other guy? Would it really be fair for me to just come in and ruin her life again? Jealousy ripped through my body at the thought of her choosing him over me.

Our eyes locked and the way she looked at me answered any question about whether it was he or I that held her heart. She ran to me throwing herself into my arms molding her body to mine. Feeling her against me like this even for a second breathing in the glorious scent of her blood that made my throat burn with desire, was like ecstasy. I lifted her into my arms and carried her to the elevator. We needed some alone time to sort things out. Alice would take care of her friends. I was sure of it. I could count on her.

**Jim**

Everything was going perfect tonight. The dance contest went off without a hitch and Isabel seemed to be having a good time. She'd been a little nervous, but in the end we were perfect and she smiled the whole time. I was decided I was going to take her out for Valentine's day and propose. Before I wasn't sure she was ready, but after tonight, I felt I truly had captured her heart. I couldn't wipe the goofy grin off my face as I gazed at the love of my life.

She must be having a good time. She'd already downed two glasses of champagne and I'd just finished telling her about my boss and his strange family when a peculiar look came across her face. She stared at the podium and the color drained from her face. The glass of champagne she'd been holding fell from her hand and it shattered everywhere.

"Iz, Izzie are you ok?" I waved my hand in front of her face but it didn't look like she saw me. She looked right through me with her mouth and eyes open wide like she was in shock. She scanned the room frantically. She was looking for something or someone, but who. I inhaled sharply as her eyes locked on a table across the room where Dr. Cullen's family was seated. Did she know them?

"Izzie," I shook her shoulders and she snapped back to reality excusing herself quickly to the ladies room leaving me staring after her.

"What was that about?" Haley asked. I stared after her.

"I wish I knew," I said.

She'd been gone almost ten minutes and I was beginning to worry that something had happened to her. I started out into the lobby to see if I could find her. Maybe she was sick or something. I wasn't watching where I was going and I ran straight into a tiny girl with short, choppy black hair and pale white skin.

"Sorry," I said distractedly glancing behind her into the lobby to see if I could find Izzie.

"It's ok. Are you Jim?" she asked in a melodic voice.

"Uh yeah, why?" I asked perturbed that she seemed to know who I was, yet I had no idea who she was.

"Well I was just in the bathroom and I ran into a girl with dark hair. She said her name is Isabella she asked me to find her boyfriend, a guy named Jim and tell him that she wasn't feeling well and she called her friend Veronica for a ride home. Says she'll call you when she's feeling better and not to worry."

"What? Why would she do that? I could have driven her home," I said in exasperation. When I looked up the girl was already gone.

Why the hell was so reluctant to rely on me? I know she hated to play the damsel in distress, but this was taking things too far. I pulled my cell out of my pocket dialing Veronica's number.

"Damn it!" I swore as it sent me to voicemail for the third time.

**Bella**

We entered the room and Edward set me down gently on the end of the bed. He knelt in front of me. His eyes were level with mine. He didn't say anything for a very long time and after a while I couldn't take the silence anymore.

"Edward," His name came out in a whisper. I couldn't take my eyes off of him. He was even more beautiful than I remembered. His eyes were dark, which meant he hadn't fed in a while. I shivered a little enjoying the dangerous look in his eyes. He was still kneeling in front of me. Slowly he reached out his hands and cupped my face with his icy fingertips. He drew me closer to him bringing his lips down placing a feather light kiss on my lip. His touch was light, but caused my whole body to tingle. It amazed me what one brief touch of his lips could do to me even after all these years.

All the stress and worry and pain from the past five years melted away and there was nothing but the two of us. He continued to move his mouth over mine gently. My lips parted and invited him in. He allowed his tongue to penetrate my lips and for the first time he didn't pull away. Pulling me closer, his hands found purchase in my hair and he pulled me even closer crushing me hard against his cold chest.

He pulled me onto his lap caressing the small of my back ever so lightly. He sent a trail of kisses starting on my forehead, my nose, my lips, my neck, and to my utter surprised and delight pulled the strap of my dress down and let his lips glide gently over the heated skin of my exposed shoulder.

My body quivered and welcomed his touch as I brought his lips back to mine kissing him hungrily.

"Bella we shouldn't," he said pulling away gently.

"I know just a few more minutes," I pleaded knowing he would pull away again scared of hurting me with his brute strength.

He groaned, but gave in to his desire and continued to place open mouthed kisses over every inch of my neck.

"Edward please," I moaned begging him to undress me as I lowered the other strap on my dress. I wanted him to lose control and take me right here, right now. I needed to know he wanted me that way. I decided rather unwisely to up the anti and slid one of my hands underneath his shirt feeling the hardness of his bare chest.

A low growl escaped his throat and he moved swiftly to the other side of the room. He looked ashamed as I lay panting.

"Sorry," he apologized quietly.

" I haven't been around you in a long time and your blood still sings to me."

"It's okay. You have more control that you realize," I said. What I said was the truth. We'd gone much further in the past five minutes than we'd gone the entire time we were together and yet here I was still alive. Of course he gave me a skeptical look moving again to sit beside me on the edge of the bed.

"You are far too tempting in that dress," he said smiling wryly as he pulled the straps back into place. His face took a more serious look and his voice became somber as he spoke again.

"Bella I'm sorry," he started.

"I am so sorry for leaving you. Words cannot express the depths to which my heart aches for the fact that I caused you so much pain. I know I am selfish for asking you to forgive me, but I need only tell you that my reasons for leaving you were to save you from the danger I brought into your life. I thought you would be safe if I left. I thought that I wanted you to live your life normally without the burden of an immortal dangerous vampire for a boyfriend. I wanted you to have all the human experiences, dating, going to college, falling in love, getting married, having a baby. I wanted you to have the life you wanted.

"Edward," I interrupted him placing my hand on his shoulder.

"That is the life you wanted for me. It was never the life I imagined for myself, not even as a child. The life I wanted was to be with you." I took his hands in mine, my eyes imploring him to understand my heart's desire.

"Bella please," he said looking away. "You can't give that up for me."

"I can and I will. Edward, you've made my decisions for me long enough. I have what you wanted me to have. Don't you see? I went to college. I met a nice normal human guy who wants to marry me and have children with me."

He looked miserable at my words, his breath catching in his throat as he tried hard to suppress a sob.

I tilted his head towards me. "Edward look at me!" I commanded forcefully.

"I have all of that and I don't want it. I've never wanted anything less. I want you and only you. I want to be a part of your family. I want you to make me yours forever," I said knowing he understood quite well the hidden meaning behind my words.

"No Bella! You know I won't ever do that to you. I will not condemn you to a soulless existence." His pain turned to anger as he exploded in front of me.

My heart began to ache like the hole that had just healed had been ripped in two. I quickly stood up and bolted for the door. I knew it was fruitless and that he would catch me, but I couldn't stand to be near him. I couldn't stand to be this close to him and to have him reject me like this. I'd waited five years for him to come back into my life and now it was all for nothing. He hadn't changed his mind about me. He still didn't love me enough to want to be with me for eternity. I was decided. If I couldn't have Edward then I'd say yes to Jim's proposal. That should be enough to kill him slowly over the years. He deserved to feel even half the pain I was feeling right now.

I didn't even make it to the door before his strong cold arms were around my waist preventing me from leaving. His grip was gentle and if I pushed, I knew he would let me go and that was the part that hurt the most. He wasn't willing to fight for me. He didn't then and he wouldn't now.

Hot angry tears welled up in my eyes. "Let me go Edward!"

I squirmed desperate to be free of his grip. He turned me slowly to face him.

"Where are you going Bella?"

"Well if you don't want me in your life, then I know someone who does," I snapped bitterly.

"If you don't love me enough to be with me for all eternity then I will do you a favor and marry Jim instead. Is that what you want?"

He dropped his arms reeling back like I'd slapped him hard across the face. His eyes were wild with emotion. First disbelief, then shock and finally heartbreak. He sank to his knees, looking up at me his eyes full of fear.

"If that is what you want Bella then I won't stop you. But I will beg you to stay with me. I love you more than anything in this world or any other. I'm sorry that you still can't see that. I've tried time and again to do what is right for you, but it doesn't seem to matter because in the end I always end up hurting the one person I never wanted to feel pain. You were my life Bella and I still want you to be, but that is selfish. I do want you to be my wife for all eternity Bella. I want your mind body and soul to be mine, but I just don't know if I can take your life."

**Edward**

She had asked me to take her life again. She knew very well what my position on that was and she still wanted it. What a silly girl to give up her beautiful beating heart to be with a monster like me. I was still resolved that I would not take her soul. She ran for the door as I suspected she would.

I caught her before she reached it.  
"Where are you going Bella?" I asked the question I really didn't want to know the answer to. Was she going back to him? If I refused to turn her would she choose to be with him?

And then she said it. She threatened to leave me and marry that human. I reeled back in shock like she'd stuck a knife through my heart. I could no longer remain upright and sunk down to my knees. She was trying to hurt me, to punish me for what I had done to her and it was working. I knew that she didn't love this man, but would tie herself to him permanently to be stubborn and prove a point all the while ruining her life. Was it so bad if she didn't love him? He loved her and he was human he could give her everything I couldn't. That would be enough wouldn't it? She would be safe and live out her normal human life even if she wasn't truly happy.

No I decided. He didn't feel for her one fraction of what I did and she did not return his affections. Condemning my Bella to a loveless marriage would not be something I would want for her.

She looked at me placing her hand on my face. It burned with her heat.

"I love you Edward," she said. "But I won't stay with you like this and someday have people think I'm your mother and then your grandmother. I don't' want a man who won't touch me the way I long to be touched and make love to me the way he should. You can give me all of those things so easily, but you won't. You can make all of my dreams come true, but you'd rather I suffer. I'm sorry Edward. If I could turn you human I would in a heartbeat, but I can't. The choice is yours. I should go now." She let her hand fall slowly from my face with a tear slowly trickling down her roughed cheek. Could I really watch as she walked out that door towards a life that was sure to cause her grief in the end? No I couldn't. I couldn't let her leave.

"Bella wait," I whispered rising to my feet. I was at my breaking point. If this is what she wanted, what she truly desired then I would give it to her. She could have asked me for anything right now and I would deny her nothing. I couldn't bear to live without her and she knew it.

She turned around slowly to face me. "Yes Edward."

I looked deep into her chocolate brown eyes. They were brimming with hope.

"Marry me and I will change you," I acquiesced.

Her eyes went wide like she was expecting me to let her go. I could hear her heart rate accelerate furiously as the blood flooded to her cheeks.

"Edward Cullen did you just propose to me?" She smiled with a hint of a smirk knowing that she finally had me right where she wanted me.

"I think I did Miss Swan," I said eagerly awaiting her response.


	6. Chapter 6: A Welcome Fit for a Cullen

**Chapter 6: A Welcome Fit for a Cullen**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.**

**Bella**

Was I dreaming? I had to pinch myself to make sure that I was awake. Edward Cullen the love of my life had just asked me to marry him and then on top of that agreed to change me into a vampire so we could be together forever.

"Bella?" His velvety voice snapped me back to reality.

"Mmmm," I murmured.

"Is that a yes?" He questioned.

In all of my excitement I'd forgotten to answer him.

"Of course it's a yes. Edward. I'd love nothing more than to be your wife." Did he even think there was another response to that question?

He exhaled like he'd been afraid I'd say no and to anyone else I would have. My views on marriage were skeptical at best, but with Edward everything was different.

I threw my arms around his neck and he held me tightly. We were engaged! My heart was soaring at the moment as I reveled in his embrace as he held me tightly. Less than a minute later, there was a loud knock on the door.

"Who could that be?" I asked confused. Who else knew we were here? I began to freak out a little thinking Jim had followed us up here.

"That would be our eavesdropping family." He smiled with mild amusement.

Oh my God! Of course Alice had seen this and had blabbed it to the rest of the family. Duh Bella, way to be stupid and human.

Edward loosened his grip on me instead pulling me into his side before opening the door. Just as he'd said, there they were all six of them smiling at us as they stood in the doorway. Alice was the first to greet us throwing her arms around us excitedly.

"I knew you'd be part of our family one day Bella. You're going to make the best sister ever. I can't wait to start planning the wedding. Do you like Calla Lilies or Roses better?"

"Slow down Alice and let the rest of us have our turn at welcoming Bella to the family," said Carlisle.

As the rest of the family entered the room I could see the joy on their faces. Even Rosalie seemed okay with the idea of me joining the family.

Carlisle greeted me with enthusiasm. "You sure have grown into a lovely young woman Bella. We are delighted to have you as our daughter."

Esme was next, she looked as if she had been able to, she would cry. She hugged me warmly.

"I am so happy that you and Edward have reunited. The two of you were meant to be. He's so happy when he's with you. I thought he would never find someone to love and share his life with. He was so lonely until you came into his life."

"Esme you're embarrassing me," Edward groaned as he moved over to join me slipping his arms protectively around my waist.

"Don't be silly Edward, that is what mother's are for," she sniffed.

Jasper approached me with caution. "Bella I'm so truly sorry that my lack of control caused you so much pain. I promise you that I will never let my appetite get in the way of your happiness again."

"Jasper, it wasn't your fault. I was very clumsy. It could have happened to anyone." I moved toward him to show him that I was not afraid. I hugged him tightly. He seemed to relax and accept that I was not mad at him. He could sense my happy feelings I'm sure.

"Break it up you two it's my turn to smother the newest member of the Cullen family," Emmett chimed in gathering me into a giant bear hug and lifting me several feet off the ground.

"Put her down you imbecile," Rosalie commanded." You'll kill her and then we'll have to listen to an eternity of Edwards self loathing." She rolled her eyes as she spoke. Now that was the Rosalie I knew.

He put me down and Rosalie did something strange. She closed the short distance between us, leaned over and hugged me ever so slightly as she placed a light kiss on my cheek.

"Glad to have you around again," she said.

I was stunned. This was the highest complement to be paid from Rosalie. I stood gaping at her in shock.

"Don't go fainting or anything. I'm just sick of Edward's pathetic existence when you're not around. You have no idea how annoying he's been."

I couldn't help myself from giggling a little.  
"How bad was it without me?" I asked looking at the family.

They all groaned loudly.  
"That bad huh?" I looked at Edward and smiled, glad he missed me as much as I missed him.

Edward

My existence was complete. My Bella had agreed to marry me. My dead heart was bursting with joy. I would let myself bask in the glow of our happy moment for now. I would think later about the promise I'd just made to her. One that I would have to honor. I would have to kill my wife. I pushed it to the back of my mind. I could hear my family outside the door waiting for me to acknowledge their presence. Alice of course couldn't wait and banged on the door to speed up the process.

She had seen the proposal and Bella's response and informed the rest of the family who were just as nosy. They were all crowded outside the door waiting to congratulate us.

As the rest of the family was greeting Bella, Alice pulled me aside.

"I only saw what was going to happen a few minutes ago, but I ran as fast as I could and retrieved this from your room." She handed me one of the only things I had left from my human life, my mother's engagement ring. Alice knew I had thought of Bella wearing it someday. I hugged my sister close. "Thanks Alice, you're the best sister a guy could ask for."

"You can thank me later with something by Louis Vuitton," she joked.

"Did you take care of that other matter?" I asked referring to Bella's friends and boyfriend.

"Yea I told him she was sick and that she was with some girl Veronica. One of her friends I'd seen her with in my visions. He seemed upset, but he bought it."

Poor guy he was going to propose to her on Valentine's day, so romantic, thought Alice.

Her thoughts made me sick. Even the thought of that man buying a ring for my Bella made me want to murder him.

"Don't even think that, " she hissed. "Bella would be devastated. She might not love him, but she cares about him."

Esme was getting all emotional over our engagement. Her thoughts were far sappier than what she was saying to Bella, but I thought it best to get over there before she really embarrassed me.

"Esme you're embarrassing me," I said putting my arm around Bella's waist and pulling her closer to me. She relaxed content in my cold arms. I could feel the thumping of her heart. It was slow and regular.

After my family had made their congratulations they excused themselves and left us alone.

"You hardly ate anything at dinner," I commented remembering the two glasses of champagne she'd had on a nearly empty stomach.

"I'm fine," she insisted.

"Let me take you somewhere or would you prefer to order in room service?"

"Let's order in I don't want to leave just yet," she said worry in her eyes.

"What is it love?" I hated the thought of anything upsetting her.

"Well I'm just thinking of how I'm supposed to act around my friends and what I'm supposed to say to Jim,"she said quietly looking down at her shoes.

"What do you want to say to him?" I asked I put my finger lightly under her chin and lifted her face so that her eyes met mine.

"I don't know. He's been so wonderful to me. I don't want to hurt him on purpose. I know I will hurt him, but I don't want to be mean about it."

"Of course you don't love. You don't have a mean bone in that beautiful body of yours. You don't have to tell him of our engagement. You can simply give an excuse to end your relationship and eventually when he finds out it won't be such a blow." I tried not to show how eager I was for her to remove him from her life.

"One question Edward. Doesn't he think you are in high school and if so how do I explain robbing the cradle?"

I almost died laughing. Her, twenty-three year old Bella robbing the cradle of a 108 year old vampire. "Don't worry. I have a variety of ID's all with different ages. I even have an ID that says I attend Portland U as a grad student."

"How did you manage that one?" she asked eying me suspiciously.

"Well when I knew you went there I enrolled in a few online courses and had one made. I thought it might come in handy if I had to sneak onto campus to…"

Oops I'd almost all but admitted that I'd been stalking her. I waited for her reaction.

"To what, sneak in and spy on me?" she gasped.

"Well not spy, just ogle a little," I said cheekily.

She looked shocked at my response and for a second I thought she was angry, but then her lips parted into a smile.

"You really can't stay away from me can you?" She shook her head smiling.

I was relieved that she wasn't angry.

"No of course not love. You have that effect on people. That poor guy you're going to break up with. He's probably under your spell."

"Spell?" she questioned.

"Yes, you bewitch men. They all want you. Remember back in Forks. I almost snapped that Mike Newton in half and that Tyler kid too and don't foget about Eric Yorkie and that dog Jacob Black."

"A hundred and eight year old vampire jealous of high school boys. I never will get over that one," she laughed. "Of course you never had any reason to be jealous. None of them ever held a candle to you." She said stroking my ego.

"What would you like to order from room service?" I asked not having forgotten that she needed to be fed.

"Uh actually now that you mention it I am pretty hungry. I hope you brought your big wallet," she joked.  
It always made Bella a little uncomfortable knowing that we had limitless supplies of money lying around.

"What would you like, pasta?" I suggested.

"And some coffee," she added

I lifted my eyebrow. "Coffee at this hour?"

"I want to stay up with you for a while. I don't want to sleep yet. What if this is a dream and I wake up tomorrow and you're gone." It pained me that I had done everything to earn the look of worry that crossed her face.

"I promise you love. I will be here when you wake up. Today and everyday for the rest of our lives." I only hoped that she would come to believe in me like she once had.

**Bella**

Tonight had by far been the best night of my life. I had eaten only a few bites of the room service Edward had kindly ordered for me. I was too nervous to focus on food. Alice had placated Jim with some story about how I had gotten ill and then went home with Veronica. I had to get to her before he did. If he called her she of course would have no idea what he was talking about and I would be caught in my web of deception.

As if he could hear my thoughts Edward handed me his little silver phone. I dialed quickly not quite sure what I was going to say. Veronica picked up on the third ring.

"Someone better be dead," she griped. I realize I had woken her.

"Ver, sorry to wake you. It's Bella. I mean Izzy," I corrected myself.

"Iz weren't you at that benefit tonight?" She sounded more awake now.

"Yea I was, but something happened you haven't talked to Jim yet have you?" I winced hoping she hadn't.

"No, why?" She was now wide awake and peaked with curiosity. "Did he propose?" She questioned

"No no nothing like that," I responded quickly.

"Then what happened?" she asked. I could just imagine her sitting up in bed with her eye mask off and her arms crossed.

I looked at Edward searching for something to say.

"I got cold feet!" I blurted out. "I could feel that he was hoping our relationship was going somewhere and after you fed me all of that stuff about him buying a ring I just got so nervous that I freaked out and left him there in the middle of the benefit." It wasn't a total lie. I did leave him there and I was freaked out about him proposing.

"Iz did anyone ever tell you you've got mental problems?" she sighed.

"I know I know I do, but you're my best friend and I need you to do something for me. Please if Jim calls tell him I got sick and that I called you to pick me up from the benefit and I spent the night with you at your place." Wait for it, wait for it.

"What!" she gasped. "You want me to lie to the man after everything you've put him through? No way! He's such a nice guy I'm not lying to him for you." I knew she would be mad. Jim was her friend too and I was hurting him. She had every right to turn me down. I guess I'd just have to resort to blackmail.

"Ver come on you owe me and you know it. How many times have I covered for you?" She didn't answer because she knew I had her on that one and she couldn't argue.

"Fine, but where are you really?" she questioned.

"I can say right now, but I promise I will explain everything to you and to Haley tomorrow. Meet me at Verona tomorrow at six. We'll have drinks and I'll talk. I promise. Just don't tell Jim anything. If he asks tell him I'm still sick and laying low at your place. Whatever you do. Don't let him in if he comes over," I warned.

"Fine but you now owe me big time," she said.

"Sure sure whatever you want," I agreed quickly. "Just do what I said."

I hung up relieved that she was helping me, but knowing that tomorrow was going to be a long day.

Edward was staring at me after I'd hung up.

"You'll tell them everything?" he asked eyebrows raised

"No not everything, just about running into you and how it drudged up old feelings making me realize that Jim and I aren't meant to be and that I'm going to end it with him."

"Let's not talk about such things right now. I want you all to myself tonight," he whispered bringing himself closer so he could caress my cheek with his cold fingers.

I scooted closer to him on the bed and that's all we needed. It was like we were on fire and suddenly I was on his lap straddling him. His fingers were in my hair pulling me as close to him as humanly possible. His lips possessed mine with a vigor and passion that he'd never let loose before. Suddenly I felt him under me.

He was aroused. It was the first time he'd ever held me close enough for me to feel his desire for me.

I pushed myself closer to him letting myself press against his desire. He groaned as his hands disentangled themselves from my hair and began a mad search of my body. He gently caressed my face, my neck, my shoulders and his hands made their way down my back to my waist. He held me tighter than he ever had before. I didn't want him to stop. If he continued I would let him have me tonight all of me. It was no secret that I'd been willing to let him have me since the day we met.

**Edward**

She hung up the phone and in an instant I was at her side. I couldn't help myself. I needed to be near her to be touching her to be as close to her as possible. I threw caution to the wind and scooped her up and placed her on my lap so she was straddling me. I kissed her passionately using my hands to explore every curve of her body. When I got to her waist I stopped. I didn't want to rush her into anything. I also had deep concerns over being entirely intimate with her while she was human. But I couldn't stop myself from wanting her to be closer. Her breathing was erratic I moved my lips from hers and began to graze them gently down her neck. She moaned with pleasure and arched her neck even closer to me.

Was she mad? It was like she was inviting the monster within me to bite her. I knew I should stop this. That I might hurt her if I didn't, but I couldn't think straight. She was intoxicating. Before I knew what was happening I had unhooked the back of her dress and was allowing my hands to explore her flat stomach and I was moving upwards toward her breasts. I had never seen her without a shirt before and I didn't know if I could handle it. Surely she would stop me soon. If she didn't it would be too late. I would take her and I didn't know if I could bring her back.

The hotel phone rang suddenly snapping me out of my intoxicated state. I released her from my iron grip and set her down gently on the other side of the bed she was flushed and gasping for breath. I picked up the phone.

You know you should stop now right? Alice's voice came from the other end.

I sighed angrily. "Yes I know. I just couldn't," I said.

"Well distance yourself. I know it's difficult, and you know she's not going to stop you. She's already made up her mind to give herself to you completely," she said.

I glanced over at my love she was sitting up now butting up the back of her dress a scowl on her beautiful face. She sure hadn't changed in that department. She knew I was dangerous and that I could kill her in an instant, but she didn't care. She would push me to the edge if she had to. I used to chalk it up to raging teenage hormones, but I was beginning to think my sweet little Bella was indeed some sort of sexy vixen.

I hung up with Alice.

"So where are you going to take me to distract me this time?" she asked in a disappointing tone. She was used to me pulling away and playing distract the human.

"We aren't going anywhere," I said. "You my love are going to get some sleep and I am going to hunt."

"Stay with me," she pleaded. I hated to leave her, but after what I almost did a few minutes ago, I knew I needed to hunt and badly if I wanted to stay in control.

"You know that I need to hunt," I reminded her gently. She pouted and it was all I could do not to give in her wishes.

"I'll be back soon love. Don't go anywhere and be safe." I brushed my lips across hers possessively and leapt deftly from the window.

I'd gone a short distance and found a few stray deer in a clearing. It was after 2 and no one was around. I drained them quickly, but I knew that deer would not satiate my thirst for long, but I was not eager to stray far from the hotel at the moment.

I had only been gone a few minutes when my phone began to vibrate in my pocket.

"Alice what is it?" I asked annoyed she couldn't leave me alone for ten minutes.

"You have to come back Edward. It's Bella she's freaking out. She's hysterical. Jasper can't get her to calm down."

I ran quicker than I ever thought possible all the way back to the hotel.

**So there it is Chapter 6=) I hope it was worth the wait. If anyone is still reading this and wants me to continue I will, but probably only one update every ten days or so. Like I said majority is written, but needs major editing. **


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